When the Arena Feels Like Failure: Understanding the Emotional Cycles of Equestrian Athletes

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There's a particular kind of silence that settles over a barn after a disappointing ride. Your horse refused the jump you've cleared a hundred times before. Your dressage test fell apart in front of judges. The connection you felt yesterday has somehow vanished today. And in that silence, a familiar voice whispers: Maybe I'm just not good enough. If you've experienced this moment—and if you're an equestrian athlete, you almost certainly have—you're not broken, lazy, or lacking in talent. You're encountering something researchers are increasingly recognizing as both normal and potentially transformative: the emotional low point that often precedes growth. But here's the question that matters: Are these periods of feeling inadequate simply obstacles to overcome, or do they serve a deeper purpose in how we develop as athletes?

Athletes don't experience success and failure as distinct, separate states. Instead, research reveals that the journey involves complex oscillations between perceived success and failure, driven by interacting psychological mechanisms (González-Hernández et al., 2023). For equestrian athletes specifically, this oscillation feels particularly acute because performance depends not just on our own state but on the psychological and physical state of another being—our horse. The mechanisms behind these cycles are multifaceted, involving motivation, self-esteem, emotional regulation, social context, and cognitive appraisal (González-Hernández et al., 2023). Understanding these mechanisms helps us recognize that feeling like we're failing isn't a personal defect but rather a predictable part of how athletes grow and develop in their sport.

Motivation climate plays a foundational role in how athletes experience these cycles. Task-involving climates—those that emphasize effort, improvement, and cooperation—tend to foster satisfaction of basic psychological needs like autonomy, competence, and relatedness, which buffer against fear of failure (González-Hernández et al., 2023). Conversely, ego-involving climates that focus on outperforming others heighten fear of failure, stress, and negative self-evaluation, increasing the likelihood of perceiving failure (Coutinho et al., 2024). For equestrian athletes, this means the culture of our barn, the approach of our trainer, and the values we internalize from the broader riding community profoundly shape whether we interpret setbacks as opportunities to learn or as evidence of inadequacy. Athletes who train in environments that prioritize personal growth and skill development over constant comparison to others are more likely to maintain positive self-perceptions even during difficult periods (Li et al., 2024).

Self-esteem emerges as another key predictor of how athletes navigate the inevitable ups and downs of performance. It's not just about how we perform; it's about how we interpret that performance (Kaplánová, 2024). Athletes with high self-esteem demonstrate better coping and optimal performance, while those with low self-esteem show increased sensitivity to setbacks, amplifying perceived failure (Kaplánová, 2024). This creates a feedback loop: poor performance can lower self-esteem, which in turn makes the next setback feel even more devastating. Social comparison and feedback from coaches, peers, and parents strongly influence self-evaluation and emotional responses to success or failure (Coutinho et al., 2024). What's particularly relevant for equestrian athletes is that the barn environment is inherently social—we watch each other ride, compare our horses' progress, and receive constant input from trainers, barn mates, and the broader riding community. This social context strongly influences how we evaluate ourselves and whether we maintain resilience during challenging periods.

Athletes use emotional regulation strategies such as mindfulness, breathing techniques, and cognitive reappraisal to manage stress, reset after setbacks, and maintain focus, which helps stabilize perceptions of success and failure (Poulus et al., 2021). Cognitive appraisal—how athletes interpret events—determines whether experiences are seen as challenges or threats, influencing emotional and behavioral responses (Kaplánová, 2024). For instance, an equestrian athlete who views a horse's refusal at a fence as information about their approach or the horse's preparation is more likely to problem-solve than an athlete who interprets the same refusal as evidence of their fundamental inadequacy as a rider. The ability to regulate emotions and reappraise situations adaptively separates athletes who grow through adversity from those who become stuck in negative spirals. Parental and coach-initiated motivational climates, team cohesion, and cultural values shape athletes' fear of failure, motivation, and satisfaction, contributing to oscillations in perceived success and failure (Coutinho et al., 2024).

Perhaps nothing intensifies the feeling of inadequacy more than certain patterns of thinking that athletes—equestrian and otherwise—commonly fall into. Cognitive distortions like all-or-nothing thinking and catastrophizing don't just color our perception; they fundamentally undermine how we see ourselves and our performance (Hill et al., 2018). All-or-nothing thinking means viewing outcomes as either total success or complete failure—in riding, this might sound like: "If I can't get a clean round, I'm a terrible rider" (Berki et al., 2025). This rigid thinking fosters maladaptive perfectionism, which researchers have linked to higher anxiety, stress, and dissatisfaction with performance (Leguizamo et al., 2021). These distortions amplify negative emotions after setbacks, making athletes more likely to perceive minor mistakes as total failures, undermining confidence and increasing risk of burnout (Hill et al., 2018).

Catastrophizing—expecting the worst possible outcome—compounds the problem significantly. One bad ride becomes evidence that you'll never improve; a horse's behavioral issue transforms into proof that you've ruined them forever (Turner et al., 2019). These thought patterns aren't just unpleasant; they actively impair mental toughness. Athletes who engage less in cognitive distortions demonstrate greater resilience and maintain better focus under pressure (Dougherty, 2017). Frequent use of cognitive distortions, especially magnification and negative self-comparison, is associated with lower mental toughness, while athletes who engage less in these distortions are more resilient and maintain better focus under pressure (Turner et al., 2019). Maladaptive rumination—dwelling on negative outcomes—further impairs coping, leading to poorer perceived performance, especially when athletes lack problem-oriented coping strategies (Chen et al., 2025).

The development of maladaptive schemas represents an even deeper level of distorted thinking. Irrational beliefs and cognitive distortions can contribute to the formation of persistent mental frameworks—like "unrelenting standards" or pervasive "fear of failure"—that mediate the relationship between negative thinking and psychological distress (Turner, 2016). These schemas become self-reinforcing, making athletes more vulnerable to anxiety, depression, and performance slumps (Turner et al., 2019). For equestrian athletes, these cognitive patterns can be particularly insidious because riding demands such precision and feel. A small mistake can have immediate, visible consequences, and the constant feedback from our horse can either reinforce or challenge our internal narrative. When we develop rigid beliefs about what constitutes acceptable performance or what our setbacks mean about us, we limit our capacity to learn and adapt.

The relationship between how we feel about ourselves and how we perform isn't simple or unidirectional. Meta-analytic evidence shows a modest but significant positive correlation—around r ≈ 0.25—between self-confidence or self-esteem and sport performance (Lochbaum et al., 2022). Athletes with higher self-esteem tend to perform better, set more ambitious goals, and show greater resilience after setbacks (Masmoudi et al., 2015). However, the relationship isn't always strong or direct; some studies find only weak correlations, suggesting other factors like temperament and context also play important roles (Masmoudi et al., 2015). This matters because it means that fluctuations in self-esteem don't doom us to poor performance, and equally, that building self-esteem alone isn't sufficient for performance improvement.

What does make a substantial difference is the quality of coaching feedback. Positive, consistent, and supportive feedback from coaches fosters higher self-esteem and confidence, which in turn supports better performance and psychological well-being (Coussens et al., 2024). On the other hand, negative or critical feedback—or lack of feedback—increases self-criticism and can lower self-esteem, leading to poorer performance and maladaptive coping like disordered eating or anxiety (Coelho et al., 2025). The coach-athlete relationship serves as a key mediator between feedback, self-esteem, and performance outcomes (Bairachniy et al., 2021). For equestrian athletes working closely with trainers—often in intense, one-on-one or small group settings—this relationship quality profoundly shapes how we experience setbacks. Coaches who provide encouragement, positive reinforcement, and view mistakes as learning opportunities directly foster resilience, reduce vulnerability under pressure, and help athletes reframe setbacks as growth experiences (Adilogullari et al., 2025).

The emotional cycles of success and failure aren't purely psychological—they're deeply embodied. Performance spirals, where perceived failure leads to further performance decline, are strongly intertwined with neurobiological cycles, particularly stress hormone regulation and sleep patterns (O'Donnell et al., 2018). Elevated cortisol, the primary stress hormone, consistently appears after competition or intense training and is associated with increased psychological stress and poorer sleep quality (Mishica et al., 2021). High cortisol levels independently predict poor sleep, creating a feedback loop: stress impairs sleep, and poor sleep further elevates stress hormones (Agustini et al., 2025). During competitive periods, athletes show higher stress biomarkers and mood tension, which can contribute to negative performance spirals if not managed (Chou et al., 2021). This biological dimension helps explain why "just thinking positively" often isn't enough during low points—our bodies are caught in physiological patterns that reinforce psychological distress.

Sleep disruption operates as both symptom and driver of performance difficulties. Poor sleep quality and reduced duration link to higher stress, negative mood, and impaired cognitive and physical performance (Charest & Grandner, 2020). The stress-induced arousal and anxiety often present in performance spirals disrupt sleep, while sleep loss further impairs stress regulation, executive function, and recovery, perpetuating the spiral (Hamlin et al., 2021). Sleep interventions, including sleep extension and strategic napping, can break this cycle, improving both sleep and performance outcomes (Cunha et al., 2023). For equestrian athletes, this has particular relevance given early morning barn schedules, physical demands of riding and horse care, travel to competitions, and the mental load of managing both one's own wellbeing and that of a horse—all factors that can compromise sleep and recovery. When we're in an "I suck" phase, these biological factors aren't separate from the psychological experience; they're part of the same integrated system that either perpetuates struggle or supports recovery.

Athletes don't experience low points in isolation. Environmental and relational factors—coaching style, team culture, and social media exposure—can either amplify or buffer the "I suck" phase (Miller et al., 2020). Supportive, identity-focused coaching enhances athletes' self-efficacy, perceived control, and social support, buffering against negative self-perceptions and performance spirals (Butalia et al., 2025). Coaches who provide positive feedback, social support, and autonomy reduce performance anxiety and negative affectivity, helping athletes navigate setbacks more constructively (Faran et al., 2025). Conversely, abusive or autocratic coaching amplifies self-criticism, undermines autonomy, and increases risk for negative outcomes like disordered eating and burnout, especially in vulnerable groups (Runquist et al., 2025). The quality of the coach-athlete relationship, especially perceived support and communication, is a key mediator between feedback, self-esteem, and performance outcomes (Bairachniy et al., 2021).

Team culture and social support also play crucial roles in how athletes navigate difficult periods. Strong team identification and psychological safety foster resilience, group belonging, and a sense of "we-ness" that buffers athletes during identity threats or performance slumps (Fransen et al., 2020). Even in individually-focused sports like equestrian disciplines, the barn community provides this function. Supportive interactions with barn mates help maintain athletic identity and mental health, even during periods of poor performance or external stress (Graupensperger et al., 2020). Environments that foster psychological safety—where athletes feel safe to show their authentic selves and discuss mental health without fear of punishment—normalize mental health fluctuations and encourage help-seeking (Walton et al., 2023). When leaders and coaches openly discuss mental health, share their own experiences, and respond supportively to disclosures, it sets a positive cultural norm that normalizes mental health challenges (Walton et al., 2024).

Social media introduces another dimension to the emotional landscape of athletic development. High social media use and upward comparison—comparing oneself to idealized others—are linked to increased body dissatisfaction, negative emotions, and identity instability, amplifying the "I suck" phase (Fueth et al., 2025). The equestrian world on social media often showcases highlight reels: perfect rounds, beautiful horses, impressive scores. Negative feedback or cyberbullying on social media can erode self-worth and exacerbate emotional distress, while excessive focus on appearance and external validation undermines athletic identity (Lin et al., 2025). Without context for the struggles behind those polished moments, this exposure can intensify feelings of inadequacy. Athletes with lower self-esteem are especially vulnerable, making more frequent and extreme upward comparisons and experiencing greater negative effects (Midgley et al., 2020). The cumulative impact is both immediate—momentary drops in self-esteem after browsing—and long-term, with sustained exposure linked to declines in well-being and life satisfaction (Desjarlais, 2024).

One of the most significant findings in sport psychology research is that athletes' narratives about emotional low points often shift over time—from initial feelings of shame or distress toward finding meaning, growth, or acceptance. Narrative research and autobiographical analyses show that athletes' stories often begin with themes of shame, guilt, or distress during or after setbacks, but can evolve into narratives of personal growth, acceptance, or new purpose as time passes and reflection occurs (McGannon & McMahon, 2019). For example, athletes recovering from disordered eating or injury describe "turning points" where their narrative shifts from struggle to recovery and self-acceptance (Marmura et al., 2025). Studies of elite athletes' self-narratives reveal that those with performance-based identities, focused on perfectionism and fear of failure, report higher shame and distress, while those who develop purpose-based narratives emphasizing meaning and self-worth beyond sport experience greater well-being and lower shame (Houltberg et al., 2018). This suggests that narrative shifts are linked to improved psychological health and represent a functional adaptation to adversity.

The process of narrative change involves what researchers call "response shift"—how athletes recalibrate their internal standards and priorities after adversity, leading to new meanings and values (Marmura et al., 2025). This transformation is influenced by coping strategies such as positive reframing and emotional support, as well as social context and self-reflection (Salim et al., 2015). Not all athletes experience these shifts at the same pace; some remain in negative narratives longer, while others move more quickly toward meaning-making, depending on support systems and personal resources (Zhang et al., 2025). For equestrian athletes, this might look like initially defining success purely by show results but gradually expanding that definition to include the partnership with their horse, growth in horsemanship, or the joy found in riding itself. The ability to find meaning and reframe adversity is central to positive outcomes, but the journey is gradual and requires both internal resources and external support (Martinent et al., 2018).

Teammate and peer-led support systems play a crucial role in athlete recovery and resilience after setbacks. This might seem less directly applicable to equestrian sport, which is often perceived as individual, but barn culture creates its own peer support network (Sullivan et al., 2022). Emotional and motivational support from peers provides essential encouragement, motivation, and a sense of belonging during recovery, helping to reduce depressive and anxiety symptoms and foster psychological well-being (Graupensperger et al., 2020). This support becomes especially valuable when athletes are separated from family, such as during intensive training periods or competitive seasons. Positive interactions with barn mates help maintain athletic identity, which links to better mental health and less depression during recovery (Graupensperger et al., 2020). Teammates also offer practical help, such as assisting with rehabilitation exercises or sharing recovery experiences, as well as informational support, which can boost confidence and adherence to rehabilitation protocols (Covassin et al., 2014).

Peer modeling—seeing other athletes successfully recover—provides hope and practical strategies for managing setbacks. The quality and satisfaction with peer support are directly associated with faster psychological recovery and improved resilience (Sullivan et al., 2022). Peer support groups and forums for sharing experiences are effective in helping athletes cope with setbacks and maintain motivation (Truong et al., 2020). However, negative or unsupportive peer reactions, such as blame or disbelief, can hinder recovery and increase psychological distress (Golub & Steinfeldt, 2025). This underscores the importance of cultivating barn cultures that normalize struggle and growth rather than reinforcing perfectionism. Peer support not only aids in sports recovery but also enhances broader psychological resilience, emotional regulation, and coping skills that transfer to other life domains (Li et al., 2025).

Athletes retrospectively describe emotional low points as deeply challenging but often transformative experiences. These periods—such as injuries, performance slumps, exclusion, or major setbacks—are commonly marked by intense negative emotions including frustration, depression, loss of confidence, and a sense of isolation or withdrawal (Laurel et al., 2023). These experiences frequently trigger questioning of self-worth and identity, especially when athletic identity is central to an athlete's sense of self (Tamminen et al., 2013). For many, these moments are described as "ruptures" in their athletic narrative, forcing a confrontation with the limits of their abilities and the impermanence of athletic success (Farello et al., 2025). Emotional lows often expose athletes with a highly exclusive athletic identity to greater psychological distress, including anxiety and depression, particularly if they have not explored alternative roles or interests outside of sport (Clark et al., 2025). This can lead to identity foreclosure, where athletes struggle to adapt when their athletic role is threatened (Brewer & Chatterton, 2024).

Despite the initial distress, many athletes retrospectively view these low points as catalysts for personal growth. They report that adversity prompted them to re-evaluate their priorities, develop coping skills, and sometimes reconstruct a more balanced or multifaceted identity (Tamminen et al., 2013). Some describe gaining perspective, resilience, and a desire to help others as a result of overcoming adversity (Sarkar et al., 2015). For some athletes, even after significant setbacks, athletic identity remains strong—sometimes shifting from a purely performance-based identity to one rooted in internalized values, confidence, and purpose (Hu et al., 2021). The ability to move from distress to growth depends heavily on whether athletes have the cognitive and emotional tools to process the experience, as well as whether their environment supports or stigmatizes vulnerability (Farello et al., 2025). Athletes embedded in supportive environments with access to mental skills training are far more likely to emerge from low points with enhanced resilience rather than lasting psychological harm.

Given everything we understand about these emotional cycles, we can return to the central question: Are these periods of feeling inadequate functional, even necessary, for growth? The research suggests a nuanced answer: these experiences are common and often play a crucial role in growth, but they are not strictly "necessary" for all athletes (Sarkar et al., 2015). Experiencing failure and feeling inadequate is a normal part of the athletic journey, and most athletes, including elite performers, report significant setbacks and emotional lows as part of their development (Strand et al., 2022). When processed constructively, adversity and failure can be vital for psychological and performance development, with many Olympic champions and high-level athletes retrospectively describing adversity—including feeling like a failure—as essential for their growth, resilience, and eventual success (Sarkar et al., 2015). Growth occurs when athletes use these experiences as catalysts for self-reflection, motivation, and learning (Salim et al., 2015).

However, excessive or poorly managed fear of failure can lead to burnout, anxiety, and even dropout from sport. The key difference lies in how athletes process and respond to setbacks (Gustafsson et al., 2017). Adaptive coping strategies—self-compassion, resilience, and a growth mindset—help athletes recover from setbacks and use them as opportunities for development rather than sources of lasting harm (Toktas & Köse, 2025). Emotional low points can serve functional roles when they prompt self-reflection, highlight areas for improvement, and motivate behavioral change (Robazza et al., 2008). When athletes interpret these emotions as challenges rather than threats, they're more likely to engage in adaptive coping strategies and view setbacks as opportunities for growth (Robazza et al., 2025). Environments that emphasize effort, learning, and personal growth rather than ego or outcome reduce fear of failure and encourage athletes to see mistakes as opportunities for development (González-Hernández et al., 2023).

Understanding that these cycles are normal is helpful, but what actually works to navigate them constructively? Self-compassion interventions show remarkable promise in helping athletes process difficult emotions. Structured self-compassion programs and even brief self-compassion writing tasks significantly reduce self-criticism, rumination, anxiety, and stress while improving well-being and perceived performance (Kuchar et al., 2023). These interventions are especially effective for athletes prone to harsh self-judgment—a common tendency in perfectionistic equestrian culture. Gains in self-compassion and reductions in negative affect are often maintained at follow-up, suggesting that these interventions create lasting changes in how athletes relate to their struggles (Mosewich et al., 2013). Self-compassion promotes healthy emotion regulation and performance rebound after setbacks, helping athletes treat themselves with the same kindness they might offer a struggling friend (Doorley et al., 2021).

Psychological skills training, which teaches goal setting, self-talk, relaxation, imagery, and attention control, helps athletes manage emotions, reduce anxiety, and improve performance during setbacks. These core skills help athletes manage emotions, reduce anxiety, and improve performance during setbacks (Reinebo et al., 2023). Both group and individual formats are effective, especially when guided by a trained professional, though long-term, individualized approaches prove more effective than short-term or generic programs (Walter et al., 2019). Psychological skills training consistently shows moderate-to-large positive effects on performance, emotional regulation, and coping with stress and anxiety during dips (Park & Jeon, 2023). The effectiveness of these interventions lies in their systematic approach to building mental resilience, giving athletes concrete tools they can deploy when facing difficult moments rather than relying solely on willpower or positive thinking.

Mindfulness-based interventions and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy improve athletes' ability to accept negative thoughts, reduce experiential avoidance, and enhance psychological flexibility, leading to better emotional regulation and resilience. These approaches reduce anxiety, stress, and burnout while improving emotional regulation, acceptance, and psychological well-being (Martín-Rodríguez et al., 2024). They are effective for both performance slumps and injury recovery and can be delivered in-person or online, individually or in groups, with longer interventions yielding greater benefits (Xie et al., 2025). Combining mindfulness-based interventions with cognitive-behavioral therapy enhances adherence and recovery (Liu & Noh, 2024). Integrative programs combining mindfulness, acceptance, and compassion show medium to large effects on reducing anxiety, self-criticism, and sports anxiety, especially in adolescents (Oliveira et al., 2025). These interventions work by changing athletes' relationship with difficult internal experiences—rather than trying to eliminate anxiety or self-doubt, athletes learn to perform effectively even while experiencing these emotions.

Social support and early intervention also prove crucial for helping athletes navigate low points. Programs involving coaches, teammates, and peer mentors foster supportive environments, encourage help-seeking, and normalize setbacks, which are critical for recovery and growth (Purcell et al., 2019). Regular check-ins with sport psychologists or counselors enhance motivation, adherence, and understanding of mental skills (Di Fronso & Budnik-Przybylska, 2023). Support from coaches and teammates buffers stress and improves coping (Nuetzel, 2023). Training barn staff and coaches to recognize early signs of distress and provide timely support enhances intervention effectiveness (Vella et al., 2020). The social environment can either amplify or buffer the impact of emotional low points, making it essential to cultivate barn cultures that normalize the full range of human experience rather than expecting athletes to maintain a facade of constant confidence and competence.

Rest and recovery self-regulation represents another critical component of managing performance cycles. Mental and physical rest, including sleep and detachment from sport, are crucial for recovery and long-term well-being (Balk & Englert, 2020). Athletes benefit from tracking their recovery needs and adjusting routines accordingly, recognizing that pushing through exhaustion often perpetuates rather than resolves performance difficulties (Nuetzel, 2023). For equestrian athletes, whose sport often demands daily horse care regardless of how we're feeling, building in true rest periods—both physical and psychological—can be challenging but remains essential. The biological systems that regulate stress and performance require downtime to recalibrate, and neglecting this need often leads to the very spirals we're trying to avoid.

Expressive writing and journaling support emotional processing and adaptive coping. Brief writing interventions focused on reframing failures help reduce negative rumination and increase positive affect, and can be implemented quickly after setbacks (Neumann & McInnes, 2025). This simple tool gives athletes a structured way to process difficult experiences, externalize overwhelming thoughts, and begin the work of making meaning from struggle. Research on journaling interventions shows that the act of writing about emotional experiences can facilitate cognitive processing and emotional regulation, making it particularly valuable during periods when athletes feel stuck in negative patterns (Reese et al., 2012). The accessibility of journaling makes it a practical intervention that athletes can use independently between sessions with mental health professionals or as a complement to other psychological interventions.

While much of this research draws from sport psychology broadly, equestrian athletes face unique factors that shape how we experience these cycles. The horse as a second consciousness means our emotional low points don't happen in isolation—they happen in relationship with a being who responds to our emotional state (Sulistiyo et al., 2024). A horse can mirror our anxiety, creating a feedback loop where our tension makes them tense, which confirms our fear that we're failing. They can also, sometimes, offer unexpected grace, carrying us through a moment we thought we'd fail. This relational dimension adds complexity to the experience of struggle in equestrian sport that athletes in purely individual sports may not encounter. The horse becomes both mirror and teacher, reflecting our internal state while also maintaining their own autonomy and agenda.

The nature of equestrian sport also means progress isn't linear in particularly visible ways. A dressage horse might master a movement one day and completely forget it the next; a jumper might suddenly develop a stop at a fence they've cleared countless times (Coelho et al., 2025). This unpredictability can intensify feelings of inadequacy because we can't always identify a clear reason for setbacks. The horse's physical health, mental state, environmental distractions, and even subtle changes in our riding that we're not consciously aware of can all influence performance in ways that feel mystifying and frustrating. This means equestrian athletes must develop tolerance for ambiguity and uncertainty that exceeds what many other sports demand. We must learn to work with a partner whose internal experience we can sense but never fully know, and who has their own valid responses to our requests that may or may not align with our competitive goals.

The financial and time investment in equestrian sport adds another layer of complexity to emotional low points. When significant resources are devoted to the sport, poor performance or slow progress can trigger not just athletic disappointment but guilt, shame about "wasting" money or time, and pressure from others who've invested in our success (Coelho et al., 2025). A struggling rider may feel they're letting down not only themselves and their coach but also parents who've made financial sacrifices, owners who've entrusted them with valuable horses, or sponsors who've provided support. This additional layer of accountability can make it harder to extend self-compassion during difficult periods, as the fear of disappointing others compounds our disappointment in ourselves. The economic realities of equestrian sport mean that not all riders have equal access to the resources—quality horses, experienced coaching, appropriate facilities—that support consistent development, adding another dimension of complexity to how we interpret our struggles.

Finally, equestrian culture itself—with its deep roots in tradition and sometimes rigid standards of "correctness"—can either support or hinder adaptive processing of failure. Barns that emphasize learning, partnership, and long-term development create space for growth through struggle; those that prioritize winning, perfection, and comparison can trap athletes in maladaptive cycles (Runquist et al., 2025). Many competitive sport environments prioritize mental toughness, stoicism, and self-sufficiency, often portraying vulnerability or mental health struggles as weakness, which leads athletes to conceal mental health issues for fear of being seen as less committed or risking selection and trust from coaches and peers (Walton et al., 2023). Patriarchal norms and hypermasculinity in some equestrian contexts further reinforce stigma, making it harder for athletes to disclose mental health concerns or seek help (Castaldelli-Maia et al., 2019). Organizational focus on performance and results over athlete well-being can mask mental health issues and discourage open discussion, as mental health challenges are often viewed as unacceptable explanations for performance problems (Pike, 2018). The degree to which a barn culture acknowledges the full humanity of its riders—including struggle, doubt, and the need for support—profoundly shapes whether athletes can process low points adaptively or feel compelled to hide and suppress them.

Athletes' language for describing "I suck" moments reveals something important about the phenomenology of these experiences. When given the opportunity to generate their own metaphors for poor performance, athletes produce vivid, often visceral imagery. Examples include feeling like "shit on a stick," "a pudding" (conveying weakness and lack of will), "a boat with no helm" (lost, directionless), "cow shit," "a bottomless pit," "a fruitless tree," or "a bird with no nest" (Ruiz & Hanin, 2004). These metaphors express worthlessness, weakness, disconnection, and futility. Some athletes describe themselves as "a son against his father" or "David against Goliath," highlighting feelings of inferiority and being overwhelmed (Ruiz & Hanin, 2004). These metaphors are highly individualized and often remain stable over time, reflecting the deep personal meaning athletes attach to their worst performances. The stability and personal nature of these metaphors suggest that "I suck" moments aren't merely frustrating incidents but experiences that touch on core aspects of identity and self-worth.

Cultural and systemic norms in competitive sport can both normalize and stigmatize mental health fluctuations, depending on the values, leadership, and policies within the sporting environment. Environments that foster psychological safety—where athletes feel safe to show their authentic selves and discuss mental health without fear of punishment—normalize mental health fluctuations and encourage help-seeking (Pilkington et al., 2024). When leaders and coaches openly discuss mental health, share their own experiences, and respond supportively to disclosures, it sets a positive cultural norm that normalizes mental health challenges (Walton et al., 2024). Recognizing and valuing diversity and addressing discrimination helps create a culture where mental health is seen as part of overall well-being, not a weakness (Purcell et al., 2022). Mental health literacy programs and anti-stigma interventions within sport organizations can shift attitudes, reduce stigma, and promote normalization of mental health issues (Gorczynski et al., 2020). These systemic interventions work by changing not just individual athletes' understanding but the collective culture in which they operate, making it safer and more acceptable to acknowledge struggle.

Coach training in feedback delivery—especially when focused on supportive, autonomy-supportive, and transformational approaches—substantially boosts athlete resilience. When coaches receive structured training in resilience skills and feedback delivery, they report increased knowledge and confidence in teaching resilience, and athletes under these coaches show higher self-efficacy, life satisfaction, and reduced stress (Varela et al., 2020). The effectiveness of feedback depends on its perceived legitimacy and the satisfaction of athletes' psychological needs; coaches trained to deliver feedback that is accepted and meets athletes' needs foster greater well-being and technical development, both of which are linked to resilience (Tristán et al., 2021). Coaches who provide encouragement, emotional support, and constructive feedback create environments where athletes feel valued and empowered, and this support is strongly associated with increased resilience and reduced vulnerability to stress (Llanos-Muñoz et al., 2023). Training coaches to adopt autonomy-supportive styles—involving athletes in decision-making and providing rationale for feedback—significantly increases athlete resilience and optimism, which in turn drive athlete development (Zhang et al., 2025).

Coaches trained in transformational leadership and positive feedback foster strong coach-athlete relationships, which mediate the development of resilience and perseverance in athletes (Braun et al., 2024). The effectiveness of feedback and resilience-building strategies is amplified by coaches' interpersonal skills, such as open communication, individualized support, and trust-building (Kegelaers & Wylleman, 2019). Supportive coaching and effective feedback delivery enhance not only individual but also team resilience, as athletes feel more connected and capable of overcoming challenges together (Adilogullari et al., 2025). For equestrian athletes, the coach-athlete dyad is often intensely personal and long-term, making the quality of this relationship even more influential. A trainer who can recognize when a rider is struggling emotionally, who can adjust expectations and approaches accordingly, and who models resilience and self-compassion becomes a critical protective factor against the potentially harmful effects of prolonged low points.

The data on intervention effectiveness is compelling when we look at the systematic reviews and meta-analyses. A combination of psychological skills training, mindfulness-based interventions, professional support, and structured rest are most effective for helping athletes navigate and recover from performance dips (Lochbaum et al., 2022). Tailoring these interventions to individual needs and ensuring ongoing support maximizes their impact (Barker et al., 2020). Longer interventions, typically those exceeding seven weeks, yield greater benefits than brief programs, suggesting that sustainable change in how athletes relate to difficulty requires time and repeated practice (Xie et al., 2025). The most effective approaches are multimodal, addressing not just cognitive patterns but also emotional regulation, social support, sleep and recovery, and the broader environmental context in which athletes train and compete. This integrated approach acknowledges that the experience of feeling inadequate isn't merely a thought to be corrected but a complex biopsychosocial phenomenon requiring comprehensive intervention.

When we examine how athletes retrospectively describe their emotional low points and their impact on athletic identity, we see both vulnerability and potential for transformation. Athletes commonly recall emotional low points as periods marked by intense negative emotions: frustration, depression, loss of confidence, and a sense of isolation or withdrawal (Tamminen et al., 2013). These experiences frequently trigger questioning of self-worth and identity, especially when athletic identity is central to their sense of self (Claes et al., 2025). For many, these moments are described as "ruptures" in their athletic narrative, forcing a confrontation with the limits of their abilities and the impermanence of athletic success (Sarkar et al., 2015). Emotional lows often expose athletes with a highly exclusive athletic identity to greater psychological distress, including anxiety and depression, particularly if they have not explored alternative roles or interests outside of sport (Clark et al., 2025). This can lead to identity foreclosure, where athletes struggle to adapt when their athletic role is threatened (Farello et al., 2025).

Despite the initial distress, many athletes retrospectively view these low points as catalysts for personal growth, reporting that adversity prompted them to re-evaluate their priorities, develop coping skills, and sometimes reconstruct a more balanced or multifaceted identity (Tamminen et al., 2013). Some describe gaining perspective, resilience, and a desire to help others as a result of overcoming adversity (Sarkar et al., 2015). For some athletes, even after significant setbacks, athletic identity remains strong—sometimes shifting from a purely performance-based identity to one rooted in internalized values, confidence, and purpose (Hu et al., 2021). The persistence of athletic identity through these transformations suggests that identity doesn't have to be abandoned or diminished for growth to occur; rather, it can be expanded and enriched. Athletes who successfully navigate low points often describe emerging with a more nuanced understanding of what it means to be an athlete—one that encompasses struggle, growth, and the full spectrum of human experience rather than only the highlights of competition success.

The question of whether these experiences are not just common but actually necessary for growth deserves careful consideration. Feeling like a failure is a common and often constructive part of athletic growth, but it is not universally required for all athletes to experience this to develop (Sarkar et al., 2015). Growth depends on how athletes process and respond to setbacks, with adaptive coping and support being key to turning failure into a positive force (Strand et al., 2022). Athletes who can reframe setbacks as information rather than identity, who practice self-compassion rather than self-criticism, and who are embedded in supportive rather than shaming environments are far more likely to experience growth through adversity (Zhang et al., 2023). It's not the presence or absence of "I suck" moments that determines athletic development, but rather our relationship with those moments (Ceccarelli et al., 2019). When we can sit with the discomfort, extend compassion to ourselves, seek support when needed, and gradually extract meaning from the struggle, these low points become integrated into a larger story of growth rather than remaining as isolated evidence of inadequacy.

Some athletes develop successfully with fewer intense struggles, suggesting that while emotional low points are common pathways to growth, they are not the only pathways (Toktas & Köse, 2025). The research consistently shows that when athletes have the space and tools to process emotional lows, many ultimately view them as turning points—moments that challenged and ultimately reshaped their relationship with the sport in more sustainable ways (McGannon & McMahon, 2019). However, the potential for growth exists alongside the potential for harm. Unmanaged or chronic feelings of inadequacy, especially in the absence of support or adaptive coping skills, can lead to burnout, anxiety, depression, and dropout from sport (Gustafsson et al., 2017). This means the question isn't simply whether low points are normal or necessary, but rather what conditions need to be in place for these inevitable struggles to become generative rather than destructive.

Emotional low points and feelings of inadequacy can play a functional role in athletic development when managed adaptively. They serve as important signals for self-reflection, motivation, and behavioral change (Robazza et al., 2008). When athletes interpret these emotions as challenges rather than threats, they are more likely to engage in adaptive coping strategies and view setbacks as opportunities for growth (Toth et al., 2025). The ability to regulate and accept negative emotions is crucial, with interventions like Mindfulness-Acceptance-Commitment training helping athletes tolerate and learn from distressing emotions, leading to improved performance and resilience (Josefsson et al., 2019). Acceptance of emotional discomfort, rather than avoidance, allows athletes to pursue goals despite setbacks (Doorley et al., 2021). Not all negative emotions are equally functional—moderate anxiety or frustration can enhance focus and readiness, while excessive dejection or chronic inadequacy may lead to avoidance, burnout, or reduced motivation if not managed well (Hilpisch et al., 2024). The functional impact depends on the athlete's interpretation, coping skills, and support systems.

The arena, then, isn't just a place where we demonstrate what we've already become. It's also a place where we encounter what we haven't yet mastered—in our riding, in our horses, and in ourselves (Farello et al., 2025). And in that encounter, difficult as it often is, lies the possibility of genuine transformation. The research tells us that this transformation isn't automatic or guaranteed, but it is possible when certain conditions are met: supportive relationships, adaptive coping skills, environments that normalize struggle, and time to process and integrate difficult experiences (Sarkar et al., 2015). For equestrian athletes, who navigate not only our own internal experiences but also the complexity of partnership with horses, these low points may be especially rich with information—not just about our technical skills but about our capacity for relationship, resilience, and growth. The horse, in their honesty and immediacy, won't let us hide from ourselves for long. They respond to who we are in each moment, offering constant feedback that can either confirm our harshest self-judgments or gently challenge them.

When we understand that oscillation between feeling competent and feeling inadequate reflects normal psychological mechanisms involving motivation, self-esteem, emotional regulation, and social context, we can begin to depathologize these experiences (González-Hernández et al., 2023). The feelings themselves aren't evidence of weakness or unsuitability for the sport. They're predictable responses to the inherent challenges of pursuing excellence in a demanding discipline. What matters is whether we have access to the psychological tools and social support that allow us to process these feelings constructively rather than being derailed by them. The most resilient athletes aren't those who never struggle or doubt themselves—they're the ones who've learned to struggle skillfully, maintaining their commitment to the sport and to themselves even when things feel impossibly hard (Strand et al., 2022).

The research on athlete development increasingly points toward the importance of psychological flexibility—the ability to remain present and engaged with chosen values and goals even in the presence of difficult thoughts and feelings. This flexibility, rather than the elimination of negative emotions, predicts better performance and well-being (Wang et al., 2025). For equestrian athletes asking whether our low points are normal and necessary, the answer is both yes and yes—with caveats. Yes, they are normal, experienced by the vast majority of athletes at all levels. Yes, they can be necessary in the sense that they often catalyze important growth and development, providing information and motivation that wouldn't arise without the struggle. But they are not universally required, and when they occur, their impact depends entirely on how we meet them: with curiosity or judgment, with self-compassion or self-criticism, with support or isolation, with meaning-making or despair.

The barn, the arena, the trail—these spaces hold both our highest moments and our lowest. They witness our pride in a perfect transition and our shame in a blown lead change. They see us at our most skilled and our most lost. What the research on athlete development suggests is that both experiences belong, that both have something to teach us, and that the path forward isn't to eliminate struggle but to change our relationship with it. When we can recognize a low point as a normal part of the developmental process rather than a crisis of competence, when we can extend to ourselves the same patience we'd offer a green horse learning something new, when we can reach out for support rather than suffering in isolation—that's when these inevitable difficult moments become not just obstacles but opportunities. That's when we discover that the arena is indeed a place of becoming, and that who we're becoming includes not just our riding skill but our capacity for resilience, self-compassion, and growth through adversity.

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